I can’t do that! I’m sure your aware that you’ve said that to yourself a couple million (maybe an exaggeration, maybe not) times in your life. But what you may not be aware of is how many times your subconscious is telling your brain that you can’t do something. These are called limiting beliefs.
How about? “I don’t like that.” No matter how old you are there may be things that you don’t eat because you’re sure you don’t like it, even if you haven’t had it in a long time or ever.
A close friend of mine never liked cream sauces on her food, would never eat anything with it. But one day she thought why not and tried it. Guess what? She loved it! It turns out it was her mother that never liked anything with cream sauce. But my friend had heard that for as long as she could remember (or didn’t remember) that it became one of her beliefs, one of her limiting beliefs.
Everyone has limiting beliefs and they can impact your life in small ways such as food preference. But they can also impact you in major life changing ways, such as fears you may have, finances, career and other major life choices.
Some common limiting beliefs include:
“I’m not good enough.”
“I don’t know enough.”
“I am afraid I will fail.”
“I’m afraid of what people will think.”
“Having money is for other people but not me.”
What Is a Limiting Belief?
Limiting beliefs are beliefs that you have about yourself, others and your world that aren’t true. They’re holding you back from living the life you want. Limiting beliefs may be so programmed into your conscious and subconscious that they may be holding you back. You many not even be realizing that it’s happening.
Limited beliefs stem from past experiences and we just accepted that that’s the way the future would be. In fact, we anticipate and expect them. This is referred to as “negativity bias.”
Maybe someone said something to you such as “rich people are selfish and don’t deserve to have so much money.” Statements like this can result in a limiting belief that having a lot of money is intrinsically bad, and can result in having a bad relationship with money.
Or a past experience that didn’t go well such as giving a presentation. We may have “flopped” and then told ourselves we’re just not good at public speaking. so I won’t do it anymore. Avoiding public speaking may have held you back from excelling in your career or going after that dream job.
Maybe you had a bad experience when you were a youngster babysitting. Resulting in a feeling that you would be a horrible parent so you never had children and probably would have been (or will) be a great parent.
A lot of limiting beliefs can stem from your childhood and have been holding you back your whole adult life. Be conscious of how you talk to your kids as well as yourself so you don’t instill limiting beliefs in them.
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Most Of Our Limiting Beliefs Stem From Fear
When we act out of those negative, limiting beliefs, that stem from our past experiences we deepen those thoughts. As a result, the next time we have a choice to act, we are likely to make the same choice as before, a choice that keeps us limited and safe. This is a pattern rooted in fear that we keep playing out over and over again. It holds us back from having the life we want to live and results in suffering.
How To Identify Limiting Beliefs
Identifying the limiting beliefs that are holding you back is the first step in getting rid of them.
Identify a Problem In Your Life
Pick one problem in your life that you want to fix.
Losing weight is a common one so I’ll use it as an example.
Ask yourself why? Why can’t you can’t lose weight (or insert your problem here).
Your answers may be:
“I’ve always been overweight so I always will be overweight.”
“I have a slow metabolism.”
“No matter what diet I try nothing ever works.”
“I know I shouldn’t eat sugar and bread, but I could never give them up.”
Your whys are your limiting beliefs and they are what’s holding you back.
Remove Those Limiting Beliefs
Begone evil limiting beliefs!
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Identify a Goal in Your Life That You’ve Been Struggling To Achieve
Ask yourself, why (it’s all about the why) you’ve been struggling so hard achieve you goal. DIG DEEP into your thoughts.
Is it because you think it’s someone else’s fault?
Only other people achieve those goals, not you.
You think I’m way better off than so many people in the world so it’s selfish to want more.
These would be your limiting beliefs, the beliefs that are holding you back.
Take some time and really brainstorm your whys and write them down. No matter how crazy or silly they seem write them down anyway. The crazier or sillier they are the easier they will be to cross off your list.
Dissect Your Struggles
Really think about those struggles/beliefs. Are they true?
Go down your list and cross off the ones that you can easily see as false. Now write down why they’re false and write down a corresponding positive attribute of yours instead.
You should be feeling better already.
The remaining limiting beliefs are deeper and may be rooted in your subconscious and are harder to dissect.
Keep asking yourself why you believe this. When you come up with an answer ask yourself why you think this is true. If you can’t turn your limiting belief around to a positive ask yourself again, why you think this is true.
Keep asking why until you can turn your limiting beliefs into positive ones.
Change Limiting Beliefs Into Positive Beliefs
Once you’ve changed those limiting beliefs into positive beliefs (your truth) write them down in a powerful sentence.
You can repeat your new truths to yourself as affirmations, post them on the wall so you see them all the time, or whatever works best for you so you remember them.
The goal is to use these when their “evil” opposite limiting beliefs pop into your head. Turn them around by telling yourself your new positive beliefs (truths) and squash the old limiting beliefs like a bug.
Positive Beliefs
Easier said then done? Yup! But just like everything else in this world that’s worth while, you have to put in the work to see the results.
You will have to constantly turn those limiting beliefs into positive beliefs because they just don’t go away. You have to be on high alert for them popping into your head. Make them front and center in your conscious mind and flip them over (any wrestling fans?) onto the side of positive beliefs.
Limiting beliefs stem from a place of fear and are not your truths. They are only your internal reality which you have total control over once you identify them.
You’ve Got This!
It’s so easy and comfortable to stay as is, and use those limiting beliefs as excuses, whether your conscious mind knows it or not. But if you really want change in your life. Take the time to identify the ones that are holding you back.
What’s your why? What’s the reasoning behind it? Dig Deep and turn those negative limiting beliefs into positive beliefs.
Additional Resources:
Limiting Beliefs: What Are They And How Can You Overcome Them?
6 Limiting Beliefs That Are Preventing You From Thriving
